10 Oct

Do You Really Want to Have A Mistress?

A Joker once said: “If you mispronounce mistress as mattress, you are not far off.”

So you want to have a mistress. Why not? It seems to be the trend — a sort of status symbol. However, you must: a) be crazy, b) be prepared to spend a lot of money and c) suffer its inevitable consequence.

Men are by nature, polygamous. Another joker said that men actually belong to the weakest sex because they become weak when attracted to the weaker sex.. Scientists, have yet to invent something which could replace sex as the most effective seducer, influencer, inspirer and destroyer of man. Kingdoms have collapsed, wars have been lost, legions have died, fortunes have gone down the drain and reputations have been destroyed, all because of the weaker sex. Even men of God have gone astray — tempted by the very thing which they have warned their congregation to avoid.

Mistresses could be any girl. She may be a sweet, innocent kid in her teens; a wily, clever and cunning 21-year-old; a scheming, fox-like 28-year-old who is sliding downhill or a 30-ish or 40-ish battle-tested veteran who twists men around her finger. Whatever category they belong to, they have two things in common — they are expensive and they spell TROUBLE. A local writer once quipped: “If you want to prove that mistresses are dynamite, just drop one.”

So, you still want to have a mistress. This means that you are now crazy. Just relax and read these gems of wisdom below:

1. If you get involved with a young chick (it is presumed that you are at least twice her age which makes you a dirty old man) accept the bitter fact that she does it for love — of money. Remember, only your wife can love that ugly face of yours. Accent the fact that you area sucker. Since you are already crazy, do not complicate it further by being stupid.

2. Young girls maintained by dirty old men jokingly say, “Soak them while the soaking is good.” They might croak anytime. Once Daddy is gone, there will be no more sugar; a chick was overheard to say.

3. Watch out for suspicious signs. In many cases, they have “reserve” boyfriends of their own age, lurking around — waiting for your back to turn. Imagine, being fried in your own lard!

4. Avoid the cosmopolitan, sophisticated, swinging, extrovert type unless you are prepared to dish out a lot of cash. This type can also get you easily noticed and ex.; posed to your friends and friends of your wife. Remember that wives now have some sort of secret society — they tell on each other’s husbands!

5. If you are an employer or executive, do not be stupid to get involved with your secretary or office employee. You must be the supreme optimist if you think you can still “dictate” to her after you get involved. The office is a gossip factory and you would be lucky to keep it a secret for a week. Besides, that particular employee will develop “superior” air and would even commit anomalies.

6. Never get involved with a girl who belongs to a big family. She may be the type who would say yes to you because she wants to help her family. The whole clan is liable to move in on her the moment you rent an apartment. You only want to buy a cow — not the whole ranch!

7. Before embarking on the crazy adventure, have yourself checked first if you are still potent. If you are, have yourself vasectomized but do not tell your mistress about it. Give her the impression that you are still potent. If she gets pregnant later you have been a victim of item 3, but if you would still admit to being the father, you will be given the “WORLD’S OUTSTANDING SUCKER” award.

8. Above all, think about what it will do to your wife and family. A few years ago, the wife of a well-known industrialist died of cerebral attack because of the philandering of her husband. He got involved and committed with a woman who was over-ambitious — she wanted to oust the wife from her Number One position! The children hated the father as a consequence and their business suffered a series of setbacks, all because of a mistress.

3 Responses to “Do You Really Want to Have A Mistress?”

  1. 1
    Mistress Lover Says:

    Dominant girls like this one are just the best stress relief ever! More to come?

  2. 2
    Israel Domina Buckwalter Says:

    Hey thanks for this post ! You have made my day! I will bookmark you

  3. 3
    Reynaldo Diedricks Says:

    You got a new reader , ME. And thank you for the mistress post!

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